Define Yourself

I've been seeing a counselor (Christie) who is all about Brene Brown, moving past shame, forgiving and accepting yourself, etc. When I feel challenged about self-acceptance, she wants me to tell myself "I understand why this might be hard for you" (and here's the kicker) WITHOUT trying to fix anything or feel like this activity is a fix of any kind.

I find I am really challenged practicing this when it comes to my weight. I guess I struggle too because I didn't think there was room in this philosophy to challenge myself. And I know I need a challenge! When I've lost weight before the subtext of the messaging to myself was definitely shamed based (e.g., envisioning fitting into a particular outfit implied I was not good enough as I was, envisioning seeing an ex implied I was somehow better thinner--which makes sense, thinner is more desirable in most parts of this world).

Anyway, I moved past the shame of not running Chicago this year and my lax exercise schedule. When I was talking to my brother to wish him luck, he said he was under-trained but had heard of a coach who told his runner who wasn't particularly feeling a race to "define herself".

"Define yourself" as a mantra definitely resonates. My biggest question/challenge with this is "Can I define myself and do so while challenging BUT accepting myself and not shaming myself?"